After goofy trial runs and puffy press releases, JetBlue has stayed true to form and has delayed... themselves.
Yep. In an unprecedented act of self-sacrifice, JetBlue has delayed the much-ballyhooed opening of their new holding pen (also known as "Terminal 5") at JFK Airport in New York.
"We couldn't resist," said a make-believe JetBlue spokesperson who doesn't really exist. "We've stranded everyone there is to strand except ourselves, so we decided to give it a try. Since we have leather seats, video terminals and neat-o corporate slogans around the office, we don't really care about the delays in opening this three-quarter-billion-dollar strip mall. We just figure it's only fair to treat ourselves and our shareholders in the exact same manner we treat our customers. We just waited until a couple of days AFTER Mayor Bloomberg cut the ribbon to announce the delay because, you know, we didn't want to look like complete a**holes."